In business we are constantly hearing about our “areas of opportunity”, the challenges we need to overcome, and how if we just work a little bit harder we’ll become “better”. Sometimes the feedback is accurate and helpful. Other times it can make you feel like you just got hit by a freight train going 1,000 miles per hour–deflating your ambitions and making you feel like a failure. So before the next round of feedback comes your way remember that feedback is perception, and defeat is a mindset.
Oftentimes the feedback you’re receiving is wrong. If you believe the feedback to be untrue, you have the right not to own it (regardless the title of the person delivering the news). Defeat only becomes a reality when we allow other people’s perception to become our own. If it’s not true, don’t own it. Take some advice from some of the most famous perceived failures of our time. From Steve Jobs being fired from the company he started, Michael Jordan being cut from his high school basketball team, to Oprah being told that she wasn’t fit for TV–the list goes on and on. Apparently the perceptions and opinions from the people making those accusations were wrong–and so are the people in your life putting the same accusations of failure on you.
So here’s my challenge to you today. Stop accepting other people’s perceptions of failure as your own truth, and start listening to your own brilliant SELF. And remember, when someone is trying to give you negative energy it is a sign that they are unhappy in their own skin. There is no one person on this planet, aside from you, who can name your defeat–period. If anyone tries to give you the label of “defeated” they’re projecting their own sense of failure and unhappiness onto you as an unhealthy attempt to feel in control and powerful–that’s not your baggage so don’t carry it. Rather, in that moment walk with compassion. Simply stand up, shake yourself off, send them love, and walk forward by reinforcing to your own SELF that you have the brilliance, the right, and the strength to wear not the label of defeat but the crown of victory.
Gina Soleil, is a speaker and acclaimed author of Fuel Your Business: How to energize people, ignite action and drive profit. She blogs and speaks about how to create a business where people are energized, feel good and are happy. Email Gina Soleil and follow her on Twitter.