Everyone in the world has one of three communication styles. When we’re in a relationship or working with someone who has our same style life is great! That said, when communication styles differ challenges can be endless. Learn the three communication styles and what you can do to increase your savvy!
Think about the leader you admire the most. This person may be someone that’s in your life right now. This person maybe someone from your past. This person could be a political figure, humanitarian or sports player.
What are the characteristics you admire most about this person? Why do you respect them? What does this person do, or what did this person do that makes you look up to them?
Now ask yourself: How often is your name referenced by other people who are asked to think about a leader they admire most?
If you’re not the leader people think about , why not?
Your leadership brand is everything. And you get to choose what your brand is and how people see you. You get to choose whether people will admire you, loathe you or forget about you. It’s a choice.
What are people saying about you when you’re not in the room?
Here’s the easiest way to build an admired leadership brand:
- Write your short brand statement. I want to be known for _________ as a leader.
- Under your brand statement, make a list of guiding principles for how your intending to show up everyday. These are the physical behaviors that you’re going to choose to demonstrate. Your guiding principles bring your brand statement to life.
- Read your list in the morning, afternoon and evening. Everyday, evaluate yourself on how you lived your guiding principles. And overtime you will become the leader who people admire most.
It may not surprise you that every person across the globe craves human connection. Everyone wants to feel cared for and cared about by the people around them–including at work.
The number one coaching question I’ve received this week (so far) is, “How do I increase engagement?” Most people are surprised when I don’t start listing engagement tools and surveys. Rather, I simply say, “Turn on your video when you’re on a conference call.”
Magic happens when people see you on video! You become human. And you realize that you’re actually speaking to a real person on the other end of the conference line. When the video goes on people automatically connect at an emotional level. I guarantee, do it consistently for 60-days and engagement will start going up.
Here’s some stats for those analytical minds: 45% of your workforce are visual learners. 40% are kinesthetic learners. Only 15% are auditory learners. If you only rely on phone conferencing 85% of your employees won’t get the message… it makes that video button look a little more intriguing.
Contact me to learn more firstname.lastname@example.org.
A great passion of mine is women in technology, and overcoming the gender disparity we see throughout the technology industry. The gender gap is a BIG problem both from a diversity perspective and from the lens of pure bottom-line results. To all my technology friends working hard to close the gap… these are two great videos that deserve to be watched and shared.
Lately the Universe has given me lots of opportunities to rewrite my life’s direction. It feels like daily I’m being given a fork in the road. Do I go left? Do I go right? Do I stand still and do nothing? Knowing that “doing nothing” is still a decision and response to what’s in-front of me.
Here’s what I’ve come to know and understand…
I, you, already know the direction we’re suppose to go. It doesn’t matter what he says, she says, they say… “they” are simply noise in a made up story. Illusion.
You have to go deep inside yourself, under the noise…way way under the noise to find out what way to go. Breath is the only mode of transportation to this deep beautiful place called your truth. And you’re the only captain able to navigate the journey to this beautiful place…you’re the only one allowed in.
Here in this place of truth you “just know”. You know in every ounce of your being where to step, where to move and what direction is right for you. You “just know”.
In this place of truth there is no fear. There is no questioning. There is no worry. And in your truth you understand that fear, questioning and worry are simply tricks of the mind designed to keep you stuck….stale, complacent, depressed, lazy…feeling unfulfilled or worse, trapped. Your mind says, “Maybe if we keep him stuck he’ll forget about his truth and give up.”
Lucky for me. Lucky for you. Our truth never gives up. And the moment you give it the smallest amount of light the game is on! Your truth gets louder. Your truth gets feistier. And your truth says, “Fuck off! I know what I am. I know what I want. I’m in charge. I’m the captain of this ship. And there’s not a fear, not a question, not a worry that will stop me from living this life in my own way according to my own captain’s orders!”
Then you start moving. And then you start running in the direction of your truth. Faster. Excited. Determined. Fearless. And you don’t stop until you’re standing on top of your mountain.
Eyes wide open you stand at the top of your mountain and breathe in the magic. You stand on the top of your mountain and bath in this amazing view called your life.
Here’s your light. I believe in you.
Many years ago, I found myself standing on the edge of a crane at a county fair in Iowa. Somehow, I thought it was a good idea to put on a harness, be taken up into the air a few hundred feet, and jump head first toward a giant blow up mat with the outline of a dead body staring at me on the way down.
I remember standing there ready to jump. Aside from the outline of the dead body, I saw hundreds of tiny heads looking up at me waiting for me to take the plunge. As I leaned over the edge I heard the guy in the crane say, “On the count of three let go. 1, 2, 3!” I said, “Nope!”
This guy was amazingly patient. He said, “Ok. Let’s try this again. This time, turn around and simply allow yourself to fall backwards on the count of three. 1, 2, 3!” I said, “No way!” Then petrified, I walked away from the edge to where my friend was standing.
My friend said, “Gina, you don’t have to jump if you don’t want to. It’s totally up to you.”
In that moment of choice, something magical happened. I just looked at my friend and said, “Nope.” Then I took a leap to the edge like I was on a high dive, and literally did a swan dive off the platform into the air! Scared to death one minute; the next minute I’m free falling head first.
I had never felt such freedom. Little did I know how life changing that jump would be.
Over the last 20-years I have found myself hanging over the edge of that crane hundreds of times. When I was deciding on whether to get a divorce, walk away from a secure job to start my business, have a baby, go to grad school, walk away from toxic relationships…the list goes on and on. And every time I’m faced with that “big something” that terrifies me, I remember the moment when I took a leap of faith and did a swan dive off the crane that evening in Iowa—and I remember how good it felt after I jumped.
I also remember how many times it took me to jump and why I finally jumped. That memory allows me to give myself a little grace and be patient with my own internal process as I navigate life. It also reminds me that I always have choice. That no matter how restrictive life may feel in the moment, there’s always an alternative. If one choice creates a feeling of restriction or limitation there’s always another option that will allow me to feel free.
For me, it’s not a matter of if I’ll jump; but rather, when I’ll jump. It may take me three tries before gathering enough courage to take the plunge, and that plunge may be in a completely different direction than I originally thought, but I will jump. And I’ll inevitably jump because I know how good it feels to be on the other side and free.
What are you waiting for? Jump.
Do what you love, and love what you do. Gina Soleil provides motivation and coaching for corporate executives. Through her fresh new approach to business, she teaches you how to become the happiest person you know WHILE performing better than ever and successfully mastering work and life. It’s time to live your best life now!
I spent the greater part of my life looking outside myself for, well, everything. It didn’t matter what it was, I was certain that it existed anywhere outside and away from me. I became a sign seeker, Magic Eight Ball expert and connoisseur of anything relatively magical that could somehow give me the answers to everything I was looking for. This included relationship dilemmas, career woes, family challenges, self-image debacles…literally everything.
I was convinced all the answers I was looking for were floating somewhere in the Universe ready to land in my lap if I just picked the right words, said the right prayer or used the right “fortune telling” tool. There were even moments I searched so hard for the answer that I fell into complete exhaustion, depression and disarray.
Many of you can relate to this “addiction”. The constant search for the answers to your most difficult and challenging life experiences. I believe, this search outside ourselves is one of the greatest addictions in our world today.
After years of suffering, here’s what I’ve learned (the hard way). There’s not a single answer to any question we could ever ask that exists outside ourselves. Every answer to every question lives and breathes inside of us…inside of you. You may not like the answer. You may even get pissed off because the answer may inevitably take you down the road that you perceive as most difficult (so you go back to the Magic Eight Ball hoping to get a different answer). You may even get sick to your stomach because the answer, that you know in your heart is true, is asking you to face your fear and do that “big something” that terrifies you…even though you know that terrifying “big something” is leading you to the exact place your heart will be most happy—the life that is authentically you.
Here’s what else I’ve learned. Freedom is the gift you receive after you do that “big something” that terrifies you. Freedom to be what you know you are inside…or the freedom to discover what you are inside.
My challenge for you today… Go inside, deep in your heart, and ask yourself that question you so desperately want answers to. Then listen for your truth…you will no doubt feel your truth. When your heart gives you the answer, with gratitude say, “Thank you”. And then pull together all your courage and go do that “big something” that terrifies you! And do it for YOU.
Love and Light
“Sweetheart, don’t let anyone put you in a cage and clip your wings. You were meant to fly. So fly.”
This sage advice was gifted to me by my Dad during one of the darkest times of my life. Years ago I found myself in the midst of an abusive relationship. Emotional. Physical. Psychological. And Sexual. One moment I was getting swept off my feet and falling in love, and a moment later that same man I loved was trying to push me out of a moving car. I was a confident young woman rising through the ranks of Corporate America and in a blink of an eye I became meek, filled with fear and began believing that I was the undeserving unworthy soul he titled me.
I remember feeling as though I was standing in quick sand. Early on I felt something was off, sensed manipulation and even began seeing glimpses of abusive behavior behind “romantic gestures”. I saw it, I felt it and yet I couldn’t stop it. I just kept sinking deeper into the sand until I lost…me.
How could a young woman so strong and confident find herself in an abusive relationship?
On the outside I was strong and confident. On the inside I was hurt, angry, lonely, sad; still carrying feelings of abandonment from my Dad “leaving me”. I desperately wanted to cover up all those feelings and fill the empty space inside me with love. I remember just wanting to feel loved. And yet, at the same time I only knew “physical love” – attention, sex, affection, words of affirmation, external acknowledgement and all the fancy things in life. I became addicted to the pursuit of experiencing this physical love in order to fill the void and cover up the sadness. So when the man showed up with an ample supply of physical love I said yes, give me more! And when the man started to abuse me I stayed, because I was scared to death that if I left I wouldn’t be loved again.
Thankfully, with the help of family and a lot of Divine intervention I got out of that abusive relationship…not absent of scars and therapy. Years later I’m so thankful for the experience because that relationship was the beginning of my journey inward. Twenty years later, I now know what love is…physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual. And I have learned that you can only love another person as deeply as you love yourself.
“Sweetheart, don’t let anyone put you in a cage and clip your wings. You were meant to fly. So fly.” The only way out of the cage is through absolute forgiveness and self-love. It took twenty years Dad, but I’m flying.
Love and light.
It’s amazing to me how many miracles go unnoticed. We pray for good things to happen. We ask for signs, proof that we’re going in the right direction and even make ‘trade promises’ with the Divine if we can be given exactly what we asked for, “just this one time”. Then we wait, and we wait and we wait. And if we don’t experience what we asked for, in the exact way we asked for it, we begin to doubt. We begin to doubt ourselves and we begin to doubt the Divine…or the existence of a Divine.
What we forget is that the Divine doesn’t always give us what we want but rather what we need. A dear friend of mine often says, “rejection is God’s protection”. Often times, not getting what we asked for is the exact miracle we were looking for…as hard as that is to admit. Life is filled with these little miracles called blessings in disguise. Most of us have had those thank God moments when we reflect back on our life in appreciation for those unanswered prayers, or prayers that were answered in unexpected ways.
The reality is that prayers are always answered…just not always in the way we want them to be answered or in the exact time we want them answered. What is guaranteed is that the Universe will always present you with the exact miracle you need in the exact moment you need it; albeit a lesson of patience and forgiveness or an opportunity to check whether your prayer is a request from the ego or authentically from the heart. Watch out, the ego is sneaky. There are times we ask for miracles that our heart doesn’t even want.
This first week in January 2018, I encourage you to reflect on the miracles you experienced or witnessed this past year. If you reflect from the heart you may be surprised at how many little gems came your way. Looking forward into this new year, I offer you this prayer that will bring you infinite miracles, exponential personal growth and a life filled with beautiful surprises that are far beyond your imagination.
“Show me what I cannot see. Teach me what I do not know. This year I accept anyone and anything as my teacher. And I gladly receive, and will happily experience, any and all unexpected miracles coming my way!”
Here’s to an incredible year!
I’m sitting in the streets of Sofia, Bulgaria. A European city filled with hidden gems and almost a feel of Barcelona, Spain…but not quite.
This morning I’m finding refuge and laughter in one place where everyone speaks a universal language and shares the same love for a modern vice…Starbucks! I adore immersing myself in foreign cultures, but for whatever reason this Cafe Americano tastes so good.
My lesson this morning is unity through commonality. It doesn’t matter where you are, you can always find commonality with the person or people that surround you. You just have to stop and get curious to find it; when you do unity is inevitable (if even for just a moment).
Today, get curious about the people around you, and find refuge and laughter in the one commonality you share. You may be surprised on how this moment of unity can heal even the most tumultuous relationships.